Harmony Fixes the Wonder Woman Script—SPOILERS!

Harmony Fixes the Wonder Woman Script—SPOILERS!

The featured image is by Castaguer93, a person who can envision a female fighter who wears actual armor (if not a helmet) and doesn’t make sure to pose provocatively while fighting. You might be surprised by how hard it is to find such an image. I wasn’t.

I will say there were things about the film I did appreciate. I spent the first 15 minutes or so weeping because you never get to see a screen full of women doing things and talking about things that aren’t men or childrearing or chores. A mighty fighter woman with wrinkles! Be still my heart and soul!

Too bad there were so many problems even within that setting, and that it lasted not nearly long enough before MEN took over the story line, and Diana, in all of her goodness, of course, allowed them to dominate most of the rest of the film.


So here are a few fixes I would have made, if DC had consulted me.


Don’t Make The Amazonians Exist From a Male Imagination:

There is actual racial diversity on the island, NOT tokenism with white women in charge.

The women don’t all shave and wear makeup, though some could. It seems more likely that most would not bother at all or see any benefit to shaving off useful hair or applying gunk to their faces that could run into their eyes during training/battle.

The warriors wear protective gear, not exposing lots of skin, which they simply would not do. It’s so preposterous. I understand that they could have been even more naked from a male perspective, but just give me a fucking break already.

The women can and do have sexual and romantic relationships with each other. While the movie makes it clear men aren’t necessary or even desirable for sexual pleasure, it does so in a way that implies the alternative is masturbation, which is dumb.


Diana in “The Real World”:

The first time dude tries to physically prevent her from doing what she wants, she breaks his fucking wrist. She does not allow him to keep limiting her physical movements, waiting for him to never really explain WHY he believes he has the right to physically limit her movement, then acquiescing to his demands.

She does not develop a romantic relationship with dude. That is dumb, unnecessary, and plays into all the aspects of patriarchy this film pretends to question, but actually reinforces and reproduces.

His friends are either not creepy toward Diana (what a limited male imagination to say most men are going to hit on Diana and make her uncomfortable), OR, if they must be creepy losers, then she is not asked to forgive and overlook their misogyny because they have their own crosses to bear (Ignore him! He doesn’t mean any harm). Preposterous. I’m sick of being told it’s my womanly duty to care about the trials and tribulations of men and forgive them for their misogyny because they have to deal with the problems Toxic Masculinity bring to them.

The film reinforces our dominant narrative that women just have to understand that most men are creeps and don’t have time to worry about not being creeps because they have to deal with racism or PSTD or whatever themselves. It’s our womanly duty to see past all their transgressions and feel sorry for them and try to help and support them even as they treat us like shit. Interestingly enough, the men are not asked NOT to be creeps… No, Diana must use her wit and charm to show them up (as a means of politely trying to get them to stop hitting on her) and then feel sorry for them. FUCK THAT.

In a better version of the script, the stupid man doesn’t get to play the martyr. I’m sure other people also reasoned out that if Diana hadn’t allowed him to keep physically limiting her, that she would have killed the super evil caricature German before he could have ordered that plane to leave with all that gas… Instead, the movie sets up a bullshit “they’re both right and wrong” pattern in order to justify the dumb love story, his controlling behavior, and then a super immature overall message, given to Diana BY a man and reinforced by her supposed love for a man who repeatedly tells her she’s too distracting and can’t do what she wants to do because he knows better.

Having her (once) say he doesn’t get to tell her what to do DOES NOT eradicate all the times when she in fact allows him to do just that. That’s a major problem. The bombshell can SAY a man can’t tell her what to do, if she actually lets him do exactly that MOST of the time. Enough already!

Aries raised many good points while he tried to recruit Diana, but the writers apparently couldn’t come up with any nuance or counterarguments that weren’t insipid and first uttered by the male character. The power of LOVE! Meaning what, exactly? No one knows. No one needs to know. What could be more revolutionary than a half-naked, shaved, plucked, heavily made up woman who can kick serious ass but also (blindly, it seems, based on finally having a penis inside of her) believes in LOVE, as is her feminine duty?

Well, asking more women for their thoughts might have helped… Plenty of us are able to envision truly revolutionary female characters and roles that aren’t all about exciting the male fantasy…


Broader Considerations:

Either all the fucking gods are supermodels or none are. The Amazonians all have to be 12s on a scale of 1-10, but Aries can be an average looking dude? I don’t think so. That is one of many things that points to Wonder Woman springing from a male imagination for the gratification of male fantasies while almost barely succeeding occasionally in moving away from gender roles and myths.

There can be an evil genius female character, but only if she too was a 12 on a 1-10 scale, then made ugly by her evilness. Just fuck off already.

Why was this script written by three men? I mean, they claim many writers in fact worked on it, while the three men get the main credit. You can do better than that, DC! Maybe Wonder Woman (and other scripts) should be written by women? Has that EVER crossed your minds?

So yeah, woo hoo, hooray, on a first glance, parts of the movie are revolutionary and better than what comes before, but really, when you get down to it, most of it is the same fucking bullshit crammed down our throats only gussied up a bit more to pretend at female liberation while continuing to keep women everywhere in their places (subservient to men and beholden to their “love” and penises and versions of reality they claim are fact and immutable). Thanks but no thanks.

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